Bonding (BG)

Center: Interpersonal
Triads: Memorializing • Directing • Internalizing

Basic Description
The Bonding instinct (BG) is about feeling truly alive through tracking the intensity of bonds between oneself and chosen interpersonal relationships. BG is driven by the desire to feel deeply understood and connected at an emotional and psychological level. For those with Bonding in their stacking, relationships are not just about surface-level interactions—they are about forming deep, meaningful, and lasting bonds that endure over time. BG thrives on the sense of intertwining that comes from intense emotional bonds, and individuals with this instinct seek to feel truly known and validated in their relationships.

BG 1st (BG/–/–)
For Bonding dominants, life is centered around the creation and maintenance of intense emotional bonds. These individuals seek to form relationships that allow them to feel deeply understood and emotionally connected, and they view these bonds as the ultimate source of aliveness. They are driven by the desire to belong to someone or something in a way that transcends every day interactions, often romanticizing the idea of emotional merging or unbreakable connections.

BG first types place great importance on the intensity of their relationships, tracking how their emotional bonds evolve and change over time. They are attuned to the emotional undercurrents of their connections, often feeling that their sense of self is intertwined with the people they are bonded to. Belonging and being understood are central to their sense of aliveness, and they place high value on relationships that allow them to feel safe, cherished, and deeply connected through idealization.

These individuals often view relationships as sacred or special, placing a high level of importance on the memories and experiences they share with others. They are driven to form bonds that last over time, and their emotional world is built on the internal vision of their connections. BG dominants seek to memorialize their relationships, often creating mental or physical tokens to honor the people they are deeply bonded with. The depth of emotional connection is what fuels their sense of aliveness and vitality.

IPS vs. ISP Stackings
In IPS, Bonding is supported by the Purpose instinct, where the individual’s search for meaning and significance supports their desire to create deep bonds with others. They view relationships as a way to share each partner’s existential questions, often seeking out connections that help them bolster their place in the world and their personal significance. Purpose feeds into Bonding, making the unlocking of deeper meaning and exploration of purpose a way to prove that their bonds are unbreakable. 

In ISP, Bonding is fueled by Self-Survival, where the individual’s need for physical survival and bodily well-being enhances their desire for emotional connections. They view relationships as a way to share and discuss their survival needs which inevitably forms stable, nurturing bonds that offer emotional security and comfort. Self-Survival feeds into Bonding, making relationships a way to feel both emotionally and physically alive no matter what part of journey in life they are in. The bond is the glue that enables them to freely roam the physical plane. 

BG 2nd (–/BG/–)
When Bonding is second in the stacking, it plays a supportive role to the primary instinct, helping individuals create emotional connections that enhance their core desires. BG second individuals may not be as driven by the need for intense emotional merging as BG dominants, but they still value the depth and intensity of their relationships. They use their emotional bonds to support and nurture their primary instinct, ensuring that they feel emotionally grounded as they pursue their larger goals.

These individuals enjoy the process of building emotional connections and idealizations, but they are less likely to be overly focused on the romanticized idea of belonging. Instead, they use their bonds as a way to create emotional stability and grounding, allowing them to pursue their primary desires with a sense of ambition. BG second types are often able to balance their emotional needs with their other goals, ensuring that their emotional world supports their overall life pursuits.

SIP vs. PIS Stackings
In SIP, Bonding helps enhance self-survival, with the individual seeking out deep emotional connections that offer stability and support in their day-to-day resource needs in the physical plane. They view relationships as a way to feel emotionally settled, ensuring that their closest people are able to bring depth to their normally regimented lives. Bonding helps them feel more rooted and connected, providing emotional grounding that supports their physical well-being.

In PIS, Bonding serves the individual’s purposeful pursuits, using emotional connections as a way to explore meaning and philosophy. These individuals view relationships as tools for understanding their place in the world, seeking out emotional bonds that help them explore existential questions. Bonding becomes a way to enhance their relationships in a meaningful context, providing emotional stability as they pursue their broader life goals through the zoomed out nature of this stacking.

BG 3rd (–/–/BG)
When Bonding is in the last position, individuals often feel ambivalent or conflicted about how to reach their need for ideal emotional connections. They may struggle to find the right bonds, often feeling as if there are too many hoops to jump through to find the right person. BG last individuals might avoid relationships that feel too emotionally complex, preferring to keep their interactions more surface-level until they feel the exact spark that the bonding instinct needs to create the lasting connection.

However, once they learn how to integrate Bonding in a way that aligns with their primary and secondary instincts, they begin to see the value of being open to deep emotional connections regardless of context. Once they understand how emotional bonds can enhance their broader goals, they find a deep sense of satisfaction in creating meaningful relationships. They begin to appreciate that mutual belonging and emotional commitment offer a sense of stability and support, helping them navigate life more effectively. BG last types often take time to fully embrace their emotional needs, but once they do, they find that emotional connections provide an important foundation for their other pursuits.

PSI vs. SPI Stackings
In PSI, Bonding is driven by the individual’s purpose-driven pursuits, where emotional entanglements are used to explore meaning and understand their place within broader existential questions. They see relationships as tools for unlocking meaning and solving puzzles, with emotional bonds providing a framework for pursuing existential growth and understanding their significance in life. Bonding helps them anchor their emotional connections in a meaningful context, ensuring that their relationships serve their greater goals.

In SPI, Bonding plays a more immediate role in self-survival, where relationships are used to enhance sensory or survival experiences. The focus is on creating emotionally secure bonds that offer comfort, support, and protection, ensuring that their survival needs are met through emotional connections. This enables SPIs to float around the peripheries of life while feeling secure that their ideal bond awaits for them. Bonding becomes a way to ground survival in emotionally stable relationships, allowing the individual to feel more safe and protected in their emotional world.

Tension & Lines
Bonding is the tension between the self-significance and community instincts. On one hand, these individuals are driven to track their own purpose in the world and why their character matters like the self-significance instinct. While on the other hand, they are driven to track their connections and how they define their place in the world like the community instinct. The tension between these two inner drives creates the specialized focus on bonding, being understood, empathy, reputation, and belonging of the bonding instinct.

Bonding is connected to, and in turn, comprised of the self-management and alchemy instincts. When one is driven to track the bonds in their interpersonal lives, they inherently focus on the energy and time-management it takes to upkeep these bonds like the self-management instinct – as well as the level of satisfaction, impressions, and chemistry that flows into the bond to keep it alive like the alchemy instinct. The sum of these two connecting instincts, multiplied by the tension between the neighboring instincts are what all culminate together to form the bonding instinct.